Future Plans

In a few years time I would like to look at my future plans, and see what has changed and what hasn't..... So here are the most important ones!

2010- Graduate Highschool ( rotto& busselton leavers)
2011- Become a leader or be in band for mounties
2011- P's/ Buy second hand Rav4
2011- Curtin University, studying nursing/midwifery
2012(jan/feb)- Go to England by myself(meet relatives), meet up with a friend to explore
2015- Finsih Uni-Big 21st Party
2016-Move out with some friends
2016- Work as midwife at hospital
2020- Hopefully already be married with 1 child

Everything seems to be fine as usual! Anywaysss um I'd just like to say I cannot deal with Up- themself people. Every now and then is fine, but if you constantly do it, I won't stick around.
All they do is put you down and brag about themself its the most annoying thing in the world.

I have recently noticed that things that seem like they will be permenant at the time, never ending, have to end at some stage. But although you have other ideas and plans yourself, it just doesnt seem fair that in a few years everything is going to be turned upside down. I guess when it happens you tend not to notice as much, but the possibilities are way worse. You can't imagine life without certain people, but then you know other people will also become a part of your life.

Things are changing way to fast, but I will adjust, I have to, It's the way it roles baby!

My saviour

You know that time when things just seem to pass you by and you feel all alone, even though you have everything, but you can't help to look into the future? You wonder where your going to be in a few years, the way the family is going. You realise you have just over a year of school left and you'll have to start all over. Your good friend plans to move away and you wonder what life is going to be like without them. You deny it! but there is always doubt and that kills you. Friends dont seem as close even though they are. You feel like your searching! Your out of your comfort zone, but you have so many things going on to keep yourself occupied. In the end though you know everything is ok, you've just had a late night and tomorrow is always better:), life continues and Jesus is still my saviour. So you wait it out! and in the end everything is fine.

Mothers Day

Man I felt bad this morning, when I totally walked past mum a few times, asked her where something was and sat on the computer for about half an hour. It wasn't untill I looked on Google that I realised it was mothers day!!!!!!! total horror! Even though Mum asked of nothing since she got a new car, I didn't even say Happy Mothers Day!So trying to make it better, I had to quickly make a card on the computer, and then decided to walk down to the deli and get some flowers. Turns out all the good flowers were an extra $1 then I had bought, so I had to buy the last bunch of pink flowers, whcih of course just happened to be half dead. To make it even worse, as I was walking home with them MUM drives past in the car. Gahhhhhh I nearly cried, that was an epic fail. And. when mum got home and I gave her my wilted flowers, with my computer made card, she replies with " If you hadn't got anything, you could have atleast said 'Happy Mothers Day'", which made me feel even worse then I already did.So ofcourse trying not to indicate I had forgotten, I tried to promote that it was a surprise. In the end though, the day was quite nice. Relatives came over and I had a great time with my cousin. I made up for mum by doing chores. I hope she forgives and forgets!

hahah lol, no one reads theseeee, but o well, this is my expressing timmes. WOOOO holidaysss, actually im not that excited the term has gone waaaayy to fast, and i have no plans for the hols. Anywhoo i think inheritence is a bummer, i have inherited my dads stupid blood noseiness when its hot. I had 2 fricken blood noses today. And it means i can't catch the bus home anymore, unless I want a blood nose every day afterschool! annoyed asss!!!^^^^!!!!

Baptism

Well the thing is, i'm kind of struggling to take the courage to get baptised. There are many reasons urging me forwards and many backwards. The thing is to many people will think bits of my story will seem wierd, unusual and freaky and i probably would aswell if I had never gone through it. No one really knows the extent of it. None knows what i'm talking about, people know bits of the story, but its hard to get ur head around, i dont wan't everyone to think im a freak.

stupid reactions

He is a fool. Its alright when your expecting someone that you know close, or someone that you've done something to lash out at you. But unexpected reasons hurt the most. I view you differently, even though you don't care, and i shouldn't care because its not much to anyone else's eyes but, I took it personally and you havn't made an effort to apologise, so why waste my time with you. btw just because I don't react often doesn't mean every person can critiscise. i learnt a song on guitar I AM PROUD of myself!

I've cooled down alot. Is actually quite amazing how much study you can do when you put your mind to it. I feel quite accomplished actually. I seriously can't explain something that is so riduclasly awsome and stupid at the same time! night all

Ahh im soo annoyed with myself, once again i didn't do what I had planned, get a grip women. Some things aren't worth putting all your efforts into, it takes 2 to tango. I just wish I sticked to what I knew was best, rather then making a mess of things. Over people doing things on purose for attention, CONTINUOUSLY!, when you can see right through them, don't play me. I missed the bus becuz a cow wudnt let me go! Year 8's need to grow the hell up. Advice is good, but don't assume publically and be a hipicrit about it. I really wan't to be in aerial playing guitar, but I'm not good enough!

Organisation

Weeks are pretty packed. Tuesday's tutoring, Wednesday guitar lessons, Friday's Easter Production rehearsal and Youth yewww, Saturdays work all day and Sunday rowing probs and actually spending some time with friends for once:), not to mention the 3 hours of homework every night aswell as tests and assignments. Tee is tough, but I enjoy what I do, organisation in the key, you have to have a balance in your life and you'll be fine!

Things are good:)

About from the fam, life seems pretty good. I got the teachers i wanted for most of my subjects, can't wait till youth starts i need to get back on track, friends are amazing, few new people too which is good:), 11/8's is sweet i got a great partener and i love my group, helping people feels wonderful. Not working might actually be good, joining scouts might be a good idea lol. If I actually put my head down and study this year, next year will be easier, I know now that i actually want to go to curtin and study nursing to become a midwife:), now i just need to get the marks.

Desperate for change

I really need to get out of this situation, the situation being my family and I.. I would rather go to boarding school then have to live here, there is no life here for me, although it would be extremely hard to leave my friends i cannot even imagine that, most my time is spent at home anyways. Although alot of people would say they are the best parents you could have!!!!!!!!! I do not see that, and no one is me so you do not know how they change towards me. I JUST WANT A NORMAL LIFE WITH A FAMILY THAT DOES NOT CARE AND TREATS EVERYONE THE SAME.My Job will be gone in a few days thanks to them, then how am i supposed to earn money. My parents keep telling me that year 11 and 12 are the most important of your life which i know is true, and dont worry you don't need money. But i have news for them , i want to move out and I need money for that so why can't they just leave me fucking alone and get on with there lives. The reason why I am soo pissed off is because my immature, goody tooshoes brother, who rats on me and everything i do/ am going to do, who gets a fucking (birthday present)8 months after his birthday all this shit they make up comes into this room and stares at the computer screen to annoy me all the time.He has came in atleast 15 times in the past minute. If I don't get my laptop back which i paid thousands of dollars for and has been sitting at dad's work for over a year cause he can't be fucked, I am going to loose it.

Boys are very confusing

Boys are such a heartache. I'm really sick of playing the love/hate game with kieran. I can see every single thing i hate about him, mostly I hate how he brings you down with him, but despite this i still like him a little more then friends, mainly because our relationship is close enough to the relationship i'd like between a boyfriend. It makes it harder that my family actually like him and trust him and how he always writes bulletins about me. But he hurt me bad, i've moved on even if it doesn't seem like it, he can get over everything, all i want is for him to love me like a friend. Make sure i never go out with this guy. I know that if he is actually serious about committing suicide everything in my life will change, he knows every single thing about me i love him as a close friend. Josh Robinson I hate you with a passion! You played me, your a scum, as horrible as it sounds I hope your ball sucks so bad. Why do all the horrible, non- decent guys ask me out, all I wan't is a decent guy to ask me out, a christiaan boy or one who respects my beliefs is great, i'll see what happens.

first blog - this one means alot tis a mixture

There becomes a point in your life when you realize things have to change. And everything that you cared about soo much before means nothing. You never really realize why certain things you did annoyed people until you stop doing them and get annoyed for the same reason. I now realize the most important things in my life and what I need to do to achieve them. If you play me, you will never have my full love. You’ll know the days when I just want to be left alone. You never get anywhere without making the first move, life becomes a lot better when you are aware of yourself and your beliefs and intensions- when other people are making them for you, you get lost!